


Clearing Confusions

by AspenDrake



Series: Points of Confusion [6]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Gen, will add tags as needed
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-02-11 04:59:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 9,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12927993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AspenDrake/pseuds/AspenDrake
Summary: Might change the title, might not. This is a continuation of Points of Confusion. If you have not read that, you may not understand what is happening in here. I hope you enjoy.





	1. Guns and Ships

**Author's Note:**

> So, before anyone says anything, the return to Chorus will be explained. I understand you may want to know how they got back, but that will be used later. Trust me, I have plans for it. Seriously. Other than that, please enjoy the story.

Donut sighed and sat next to Grif. The Hawaiian was talking with Simmons about his home, Simmons not saying much in return. The mess hall had become a lot more comfortable after the Reds had taken their armor off for it. Caboose and Loco trotted in next, Church monitoring them. Sarge, Wash, and Carolina were discussing military tactics as they sat down. Tex was laughing as Tucker ran to hide behind Wash. From the look on his face, she had scared him, probably with vague threats. Lopez and Sheila were the next to walk in. The Hispanic robot had made her a body like his, so they could both move around freely. 

Donut idly poked at his food for a minute before shoving the tray to Grif, who shot him a confused look. Lopez watched as Donut stood and left the room. Of course, he made sure to glare at Church threateningly as the AI followed.  
___________  
“You seem upset,” Church glared. “Who do we need to kill?” Donut stiffened in shock.

“No! You’re not killing my dad!” he squeaked. Church huffed.

“How about scaring him? Or even threatening? I mean, you and your Church did save the Earth, stopped Project Freelancer, killed the Meta, and a few other things,” he asked. Donut allowed himself to grin shakily. 

“Scaring is totally allowed,” he agreed. Church whooped. 

“I’m going to see if Kimball will book us a shuttle to Earth!” he cheered. Donut couldn’t help but grin.

“Well, we might have to plan something out, but let’s do it!” Donut agreed. “After all, no one messes with the Reds and Blues!”   
__________  
“We have to wait how long?!” Church screamed. “Look, just give us a couple smaller ships or something!” Kimball glared at him mildly.

“We don't have any available. Unless someone can repair whatever one you want, you’ll have to wait for a few months,” she replied coolly. Church grumbled before vanishing, presumably to go talk to someone.  
__________  
As it happens, someone ended up being Sheila, Lopez, Loco, Caboose, and Sarge. Simmons was quickly drug into the project to do some of the calculations on the repairs and keep inventory. Wash, Carolina, and Tucker were assigned to keep Donut from knowing about the repairs. 

Caboose and Loco turned out to make a great team. They could move the metal sheets on their own, and often muttered to each other about ideas for making the ship better and more stable. Locus, who had shown up at some point, was drug in as well. He was a good source of information on standard ships and cloaking. In only a couple of weeks, the repaired ship was ready. Locus vanished as soon as it was done, ready to leave the insanity for a while. Donut had already packed several changes of clothes, toiletries, and various other items for everyone. 

As he boarded the ship, he wasn’t surprised to see Sheila piloting. Lopez was her copilot, of course. There were a few points where turrets could extend to fire at enemies outside. A large window made up a good portion of one side. Caboose and Loco waved at him before returning to staring out the window. 

A large area made a living room type of space in the middle. Wash and Carolina were sitting properly on chairs. Tucker was sprawled across a couch, managing to take up most of it. Grif and Simmons were on the other. Simmons was reading a data pad, and Grif was napping. Church and Tex popped up in front of Donut.

“Are we missing anyone?” Church asked. 

“Sarge,” Tucker lazily replied. Sarge ran up the ramp just as he said that. 

“I’m right here,” he grumbled. “Let’s go. I was getting permission from Kimball for some extra time. Figure we can sort out a lot of family issues for most of ya.” Tucker and Simmons glanced up in shock. 

“Sarge, that’s not entirely necessary,” Simmons stammered. Sarge leveled him with a glare.

“It is because I say so. After Donut, we’ll deal with Simmons’ dad, Tucker’s foster parents, Grif’s mom, take some vacation time, Wash’s family, and more vacation time. On the way back, we’ll let Caboose see his family,” Sarge replied. “Tucker, where’s Junior? Grif, go get your sister before we leave.” The two exchanged glances before darting out of the ship.  
___________  
“Honk?” Junior asked. Tucker frowned.

“Yeah, kiddo, you’ll get to meet my parents,” he repeated. Junior blinked. 

“Blargh blargh, honk honk blargh,” the Sangheili snickered. Tucker swatted at him.

“Shush. Now come on, Lopez is waiting.” Junior honked in eagerness, racing ahead of his father.  
_________  
“We’re going to Hawaii?!” Sister squealed. Grif chuckled. 

“Yep! Can’t wait to be back. I told Simmons about your favorite beach,” Grif told her. Sister squealed and jumped with joy. 

“We’re visiting it, right? Please tell me we’re using a bike to get there! I’m old enough to drive my own bike! Come on, let me drive my own bike! You and Simmons can take one, and I’ll take another with Tucker, and the others can follow in a Warthog or something!” she babbled eagerly. Grif chuckled. 

“You know what? Let’s do it,” he agreed. Kai whooped and darted to the ship bay. Grif chuckled and ambled after her.


	2. Right Hand Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As an apology for a late upload on my Winter Prompts story, here's a chapter I was going to upload tomorrow. I'll still update this tomorrow, as well, so enjoy!
> 
> Also, we meet the main villain for this arc!

The trip to Earth took a good two months. Thankfully, Lopez made sure there was enough food and water for everyone. He even managed to fit in a few nice treats for everyone. Sheila prepared meals from frozen ingredients that were put in the fridge a few days before the actual meal. Somehow, there was enough water for everyone to shower, although they had to take short showers. Bunks were included for everyone. They were all very glad to finally be on Earth. They decided to put their armor in their rented RV, so they didn’t scare the civilians. 

Simmons, Grif, and Donut didn’t pay attention to the odd stares sent their way as they walked along. In fact, Grif was too lazy to care, Simmons was imitating his general attitude, and Donut was talking to Lopez. 

Church and Tex stood on Carolina and Wash’s shoulders, arguing. They didn’t stop as a government official walked up.

“Hello. I am David Strand,” the man greeted. “You must be the brave heroes General Kimball of Chorus called about.” He looked at only Wash and Carolina.

“You are the former agents of Project Freelancer, yes?” he asked. Wash stared at David. Carolina stepped in.

“Yes. I am Carolina, and this is Washington,” she told him. David looked at her now. 

“It is wonderful to meet you. You must tell us how you captured Malcolm Hargrove,” he exclaimed. Church snorted.

“Hey, they didn't beat Hargrove. They did.” The blue AI pointed at the Reds and Blues. David jumped back in shock.

“What an advanced hologram,” he murmured. Church flickered before getting right in the official’s face. 

“I am not a hologram! My name is Leonard Church!” he roared. David jumped back in shock. Tex snickered. 

“Dude, you said that to that one guy that you laser-faced,” Tucker snorted. Church appeared on his shoulder.

“It was a good line,” he shrugged. David turned to look at the Reds and Blues. He looked at Tucker first, noting the Sangheili tattoos that covered his arms and legs. Lopez didn’t seem all that interesting. Sheila drew some attention due to her purple hair and eyes, but he continued looking through the group. Sarge appeared fairly normal, if a bit uncomfortable with being out of armor and away from his shotgun.

Simmons caught his attention next. The cyborg was having an animated discussion with Grif, waving his arms sporadically. David stared for a moment at the metal arm before actually seeing Grif. He could see the patches of lighter skin and the green eye, the more slender, pale arm. His face turned a light green as he put the pieces together in his head. Quickly, he looked at Donut. Donut had part of his hair dyed pink. The rest was in a short ponytail. His attention lingered on the scars from the sticky bomb spidering out from the side of his face. 

David looked to Loco next. Loco was only 7 foot tall, as opposed to the 7 foot 6 Caboose was. He was also less muscular than his double. Still, David was shaking by the time he saw Caboose. It took all the man had to keep from screaming. Caboose was tall, muscular, and currently frowning at something. If Church was correct, he was upset because he had been promised cookies and orange juice, but hadn’t gotten them yet. 

“Well, I can see how you defeated Hargrove,” David stammered. Church snorted again.

“Dude, you’re looking at the wrong person. Caboose took out grunts. It’s Tucker who did all the work,” the AI smirked. David looked at the shorter man. Junior picked an excellent moment to walk over to his dad.

“Honk blargh?” he honked, pointing at David. The man’s knees were visibly shaking. 

“Nah, that’s a government rep. He’s here so it looks cool,” Tucker shrugged. 

“Look, we have a tight schedule to keep!” Sarge barked suddenly. “If ya need something, say it quickly!” David frowned.

“Sirs, I was hoping to show you to our president, who wanted to speak with you all,” David stated. Kai charged over.

“Is the old geezer still president, or did he get replaced?” she sneered. David glared at her.

“I’ll have you know that President Belmont is one of the best the country has seen in decades!” he replied. Kai waved her hand. 

“Tucker, you should totally make your dog get rid of this guy,” she huffed. Tucker raised an eyebrow, unamused.

“He’s not a dog,” he told her. Kai waved her hand again. 

“Whatever,” she hummed. Carolina cleared her throat. 

“Right, to the cars,” Sarge nodded. David puffed up indignantly. 

“The president wants to thank you all for all your work,” he insisted. Carolina ignored him, motioning for Caboose and Loco to get moving. Sarge and Wash started shepherding the two away from David. Tucker, Kai, Donut, and Junior followed silently. Lopez and Sheila grabbed hands and sauntered off. Carolina led the way to the RV Kimball had rented for them. Grif and Simmons stayed behind. Grif stared straight at David.

“With all due respect, Mr. Strand,” Simmons began. Grif picked up where the cyborg left off.

“And none is due here,” he huffed. 

“We don’t listen to anyone except Kimball and Carolina,” Simmons continued. Grif leered at him.

“We’re more likely to listen to a now-dead merc than you,” the Hawaiian sneered. 

“And trust me, we killed the merc,” Simmons jumped in. David backed up a step.

“See, you don’t seem to get it,” Grif grinned.

“This group?” Simmons snickered.

“Applied insanity!” they chorused. Carolina’s voice reached them, making both of them frown.

“Tell your president to think of another way to get us to talk to him,” Grif concluded, turning and walking to Carolina. Simmons followed him. David straightened up and dusted his suit. He huffed at the group, now piling into the RV.

Caboose was about to hit his head when the blue AI told him to duck. David picked up his phone and dialed his boss.

“Sir, they’ve arrived, but they refuse to meet the president. I am fairly certain that they also issued a threat to me,” he reported. His boss snorted angrily.

“Was my son with them?” he asked. David frowned. 

“They had a cyborg who was fairly close, although he was considerably darker than the picture and taller,” he replied. His boss made a noise of disapproval. 

“Nothing a bit of surgery can’t fix,” the other man grumbled. “Get back here. If that is my son, he should visit me fairly soon.” David nodded, even though his boss couldn’t see him.

“On my way, sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! Who is David's boss? Any guesses? XD
> 
> The president that David is referring to is the president of his committee. He was trying to mislead our brave (and confusing) heroes. Obviously, Carolina was scarier than the president.


	3. Keep all of Georgia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who notices a theme in the chapter titles? Because I spent about 5 minutes trying to find this one.  
> XD

Simmons was snoring. Grif was not. The reason was actually really simple. Grif was still eating, and Simmons had fallen asleep against him. Church and Tex were trying to teach Caboose about ‘Stranger Danger.’ Initially, Wash was going to teach him, but then Sarge wanted to do it, and the two were still arguing, almost an hour later. 

“Alright, if you see someone come up to you and offer you a cookie, what do you do?” Church asked. Caboose grinned.

“I want a cookie!” he cheered. Church sighed.

“Look, don’t talk to anyone you don’t know, and stay with us,” he groaned. Caboose nodded eagerly. 

“I can do that!” The tall Blue was forced to crouch in the RV. Most buildings and vehicles on Earth were not designed for an overly tall pair of child-like soldiers. In fact, Carolina had gotten two to try and not cramp everyone. 

Lopez, Caboose, Church, Tex, Grif, Sarge, and Wash were in the first one. Tucker, Carolina, Loco, Donut, and Sheila were following. The two robots were driving and communicating with each other. The issue was, they had landed in Florida, and were driving to Idaho. They were only in Georgia. 

“Hey! Be quiet!” Lopez yelled. Caboose made his way up to the cab. 

“What are you yelling about?” the Blue asked. Lopez snorted. 

“Those two won’t quit arguing. They’ve been at it for an hour,” Lopez grumbled. Caboose nodded before leaving. A moment later, Lopez heard what sounded like two people getting punched. Church appeared in front of him.

“Yeah, pretty sure they’re knocked out,” the AI smirked. Lopez stared flatly at him.

“Tucker did it!” Caboose shouted. Simmons screeched and tried to aim his gun at the noise. His gun was in Carolina’s RV, along with all the armor and other weapons. Grif made a strangled yell before tumbling out of his seat. Lopez sighed as Tex vanished, presumably to tell Carolina.

“I hate you all,” he groaned. Church groaned.

“Me, too,” he agreed.  
______  
Carolina watched as Tucker attempted to grab his sword, again. She had Loco put it as high as he could a few hours ago, but the other teal soldier was determined to get it down. 

“Come on, Loco. I’ll give you a cookie,” Tucker offered. Loco thought for a minute before shaking his head. He was ducked down a bit to keep from hitting the ceiling.

“She said I can have a whole pack and a carton of grape juice if I leave it alone,” he responded. Tucker turned to glare at her. She aimed one back. A few months ago, the man would have flinched back and gotten as far as he could from her. Now, he stomped over to her.

“Why would you do that?” he snapped. Carolina frowned.

“Because you don’t need to be terrorizing the natives,” she replied. Tex appeared next to her.

“Hi,” the AI greeted. She stared at Tucker. 

“Why are you here?” Tucker demanded. Tex smirked.

“Well, looks like you’ve finally grown a spine,” she shot back. “Too bad it wasn’t a few more inches!” Tucker grumbled a bit before moving to sit down.

“Where’s Junior and Kai?” Carolina asked. Tex shrugged.

“Went to take care of something not too far away. They took a standard car and left,” she replied. Carolina nodded.

“As long as they’re present for meeting Donut’s family, I don’t care,” she replied. Her green eyes narrowed.

“You rarely come this far from Church. What’s happened, and who’s getting murdered?”

Tex snickered. “Caboose knocked Sarge and Wash out. Church told him to make the two stop arguing, and he went over and ‘poked’ them, and they were out like lights!” Carolina laughed.

“Nice,” she giggled. Sheila turned to look at them.

“Lopez says he needs a break,” she called. Carolina nodded.

“At the next rest stop, tell him to pull in,” she replied. Sheila nodded and returned to driving. Tex giggled before returning to the other RV.  
____________  
The fresh air was nice. Caboose and Loco were already running around, being goaded by Church. The two were apparently racing. Tex grinned and joined in, rooting for Caboose. Church turned to face her.

“No way, man! Loco’s smaller and takes faster steps!” he protested. Tex smirked.

“Doesn’t do much against longer strides,” she shot back. They devolved into an argument, missing the fact that Caboose and Loco were now running along the highway. 

Grif snickered as he sat on a picnic table. Simmons was frowning.

“Do Church and Tex…?” he asked. Grif shook his head.

“And Sarge and Wash…?” Grif broke out laughing.

“Still out!” the Hawaiian cackled. Simmons chuckled a bit.

“I guess we’ll see them in Idaho,” he offered. Grif fell off of his seat from laughing too hard. No one even blinked at the sound of his skull hitting the ground. 

“Well, that’s a wasted hour,” Simmons sighed. Grif slowly stood up.

“Nah, only a few minutes,” he replied before sitting down quickly. “What were we talking about?” Simmons groaned.

“Caboose and Loco are halfway to Idaho by now,” he grumbled. “And we’re still sitting here.” Carolina heard that and turned to look down the road.

“CHURCH!” she roared. The two AI appeared in front of her.

“Yeah?” Church asked. 

“What’s missing?” she asked, face blank. Church glanced around, doing a quick headcount.

“Where are they?!” he screeched. Tucker pointed along the highway. Church ran a scan rapidly.

“Well, they’re about to the Georgia border, and still no signs of exhaustion,” he reported.

“Let’s go!” Carolina roared. Everyone loaded back into the RVs, ready to chase down the wayward soldiers. At that point, Sarge and Wash woke up.

“Hey, where’s Caboose?” they both asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Late, I know, but it's here. Hope ya enjoyed a bit of stupidity! : D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I have this one typed. Finals are horrible. Underneath the chapter, I'll explain some things.

Caboose and Loco had made it almost to Alabama before they stopped. Church was confused until Caboose and Loco appeared inside the lead RV, where Wash and Sarge were sitting. 

“Yes, I am back!” Caboose announced. 

“And me!” Loco added. 

“Teleportation,” Church muttered. “Useful.” Caboose stared blankly for a minute.

“Caboose, who won?” Grif demanded. Simmons swatted at him.

“Me!” Loco cheered. 

“Not my fault, someone put a fence in my way. And a wall. And a lot of trees,” Caboose retorted. Church sighed.

“Grif!” Simmons hissed. The Hawaiian glanced at him.

“What?” he grumbled. “I was just wondering.” 

Simmons grumbled but settled back down.

“Caboose, come here,” Wash instructed. The tall man awkwardly moved to sit at Wash’s feet. Loco did the same to Sarge.

The two commanders started inspecting the Blues for any scratches or injuries. Aside from some gunk in Caboose’s hair, the two were unharmed.   
_________  
Carolina groaned from boredom. They had hit Arkansas about an hour ago, and there was nothing for her to do. Tucker was busy reading to Junior, but he set the book down for a moment.

“Hey, you bored?” he asked. “I know something that’ll keep you busy for a while! Bow chicka bow wow!” 

“Bow chicka honk honk!” Junior added. Tucker grinned widely and waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Carolina glared at the two. Junior seemed unfazed, but Tucker quickly grabbed the book.

“Back to where we left off!” he hastily told his son.  
__________  
After three days of travel, the two RVs pulled into the driveway of an old farm. Everyone was back in their armor, and had their weapons on them again.

“Ready, Donut?” Sarge asked, gently nudging the pink soldier. 

“Not really,” Donut admitted. “But, with you guys here, I think I can do this.” He lead the soldiers to the front door of a quite nice-looking house. He braced himself and knocked on the door.

“Hello?” A woman answered. She had blond hair pulled back into a ponytail. 

“Pardon me, miss. Is the Donut residence?” Wash cut in. The woman nodded.

“Yes, sir. Did something happen to my son?” she asked, concerned.

“Who’s at the door?” a voice from farther in the house demanded. A large man walked to the door, standing behind the woman. Wash had organized the group for maximum effect. Donut was up front, with Sarge beside him. Grif and Tucker stood in the direct middle. Junior, Simmons, Wash, and Carolina stood to the sides. Finally, Caboose and Loco brought up the rear. Church and Tex were standing on Wash and Carolina’s shoulders respectively.

“It’s some soldiers come to talk about Frankie,” the woman answered. The man glared at the group. 

“Come in, then,” he grunted. Sarge subtly nudged Donut.

“We’re not here to talk about Donut. We’re here so he can talk,” Sarge snorted. The man frowned.

“He’s not here,” the man huffed. “He’s in the army like a real man should.” Donut took in a calming breath before removing his helmet.

“Hi, Mom and Dad,” he smiled. The reactions were immediate. The woman shot forward and hugged him, while the man scowled. 

“What are you doing here?” he demanded. “I know full well your tour of duty isn’t over yet. Are you admitting weakness?” Donut frowned, but Sarge stepped in, pulling off his own helmet.

“Weakness? He took out a tank with a single grenade! He threw it almost as far as your farm is wide!” he snapped. 

“He attached three grenades to three soldiers in one throw,” Carolina added.

“He died like, eight times,” Grif piped up. 

“Grif!” Simmons exclaimed. Donut’s father and mother blinked at the last one.

“Wait, died?” his father asked.

“Yeah. Uhh, a ship landed on him, that sticky bomb Tex threw, dehydration, Wash shot him, Sarge shot him, that explosion with Cronut, and Locus exploded him,” Grif rattled off. 

“He’s been blown up a lot,” Simmons stated.

“So? I’ve been shot and stabbed!” Grif snorted. “And run over by a tank!” 

“I’m the one who donated all my organs to you!” Simmons screeched. 

“Actually, your bladder was turned into a ball, remember?” Donut jumped in.

“I was shot by a tank!” Church griped.

“And I gave birth to a Sangheili Elite!” Tucker threw out. 

“I no longer have ten toes,” Caboose yelled.

“I got shot in the head! And all I got was CPR for it!” Sarge bellowed. 

“I got blown up by a grenade,” Tex snapped. 

“To be fair, you’re an AI,” Carolina told her. “Your body got blown up.”

“Same goes for you, Church,” Wash grumbled. 

Donut’s parents were watching in complete horror. They turned to look at each other.

“How is any of this possible?” the mother asked. The whole group turned to stare at her.

“Because of them!” each one yelled. 

“Come in and explain,” Donut’s father ordered. Carefully, everyone stepped inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this made you all laugh. Now, I want to talk about net neutrality.
> 
> Net neutrality is the idea that you pay one price for internet, and all sites have the same loading speed. For example, AO3 takes the same amount of time to load as Fanfiction.net, or Wattpad. Lag may occur, based on your internet speed or if the site's being really busy, but overall, it takes the same amount of time.
> 
> Now, net neutrality is threatened. I've delayed talking about this, for obvious reasons. The vote on the repeal is tomorrow, the 14th of December. If net neutrality is repealed, people will get 'packages', much like cable TV. There'll be a social, and a video, and an email, things like that. Each package will cost extra. Now, major service providers will be able to slow down the loading speeds of websites. 
> 
> Say, for example, one provider hates AO3, but likes Fanfiction.net. They'll be able to slow down AO3, and boost the speed for Fanfiction.net, or even stop AO3 from loading on their connections. That's what is being voted on tomorrow. The worst part is, over 80 percent of America is saying to leave net neutrality alone, but the person in control isn't listening. It's very likely that net neutrality is about to be repealed.
> 
> On that note, I will still be writing. I will continue updating my stories, and all that. Even if I have to start using Fanfiction.net, or Wattpad, or some other site, I'll keep these stories alive and moving. However, I understand that some of you guys won't be able to see them anymore. 
> 
> Eventually, this will be fixed, and when it is, I'll still be writing. Just in case, however, there are a few things about the last story I wanted to tell you.
> 
> My name is actually Autumn, and Flight was modeled after me. My sister is Kim, and Pixie was modeled after her. Neato, huh? This whole time, you've been screaming for them to die, and it was me the whole time! No hard feelings, I wrote them to be unlikeable. I just needed 'villains', and my sister and I sounded like great ideas. She wasn't too happy when I told her, but she thought it was hilarious!
> 
> At any rate, don't be too stressed. Things will right themselves eventually, and we'll proceed as normal, okay?


	5. These Cops 'till I'm Free

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, I know, but I was moving. Now that I'm settled in my house, we're all good to go. The next chapter will be longer, I promise!

The inside of the house was very well-decorated. The soldiers almost felt out of place in their clunky armor. Donut was walking gingerly, as if he was afraid. He straightened when Sarge put a hand on his shoulder, smiling at the older man. Mr. Donut lead them to a large living room, gesturing at the seats. Everyone remained standing, but took their helmets off. They spread out more.

“So, tell us more about your adventures,” the man demanded. 

“Classified,” Carolina snapped. “We’re here for one reason, and one reason only.” Lopez walked slowly and steadily into the house, stepping up to Donut’s father. 

“Donut stays with us,” Lopez stated. The man blinked in surprise before scowling.

“You can’t keep my son away from me!” he snarled.

“Actually,” Donut began. “I made that decision.” His father turned to face his son.

“You don’t get a choice!” he yelled. He stepped forward, but stopped when Caboose moved in front of the pink soldier. 

“Yeah, I’d say it’s all up to him, and he said he wants to come with us, so I think he’s coming with us,” the Blue replied in his usual rambling way. Donut’s father moved closer.

“Are you telling me my son gets more say than I do?!” he bellowed. “You sound like you can’t even function without serious help!” Caboose ignored him, already turning to talk with Church, who was flickering slightly. Wash and Sarge bristled.

“Hey, no need to sling insults,” Donut attempted to calm the group down. Sarge brushed past him.

“I think your son is part of my team,” Sarge huffed. “And he has a higher rank than you, I daresay!” 

“I wasn’t in the military!” the man retorted. “Civilians are who pay for military services, so I’m your boss!” Wash laughed sarcastically.

“Well, ‘Boss,’ your money went to the freelancers,” Church jumped in. “Trust me, none of it went to us.” Donut’s father looked at him in rage.

“You all want to keep my son with you?” he roared. Everyone nodded. “That’s kidnapping and Stockholm Syndrome! I’ll have you all arrested!”

“Ooh, a high-speed chase!” Grif cackled. “Can’t wait!” The man grabbed for his phone, prompting them to run.

“They’ll get you all! And I’ll make you all pay with your careers!” he yelled from behind them. 

“Let’s go!” Simmons squawked. Lopez got ahead of the group, jumped into the RV, and started it while everyone piled in. Sheila followed suit. The two vehicles pulled out in a spray of dirt and gravel.  
___________  
“It’s the cops!” Grif announced at the sound of sirens. Lopez and Sheila pulled over, making him groan in disappointment. 

“Hello, officer,” Sheila greeted. “How may I help you today?” The policeman grunted.

“I’ve received a call about the kidnapping of a ‘Franklin Delano Donut,’ and was told he was in one of these here RVs,” he replied. Sheila tilted her head slightly.

“We do have Franklin Delano Donut onboard. However, he came of his own free will. Would you like to speak with him?” she asked. The policeman nodded.

“If it’s not a problem, miss,” he answered. Donut jumped out.

“I bet my dad called this in,” he grumbled. “I’m happy here!” The policeman shook his head.

“Armor off, down on the ground!” he barked suddenly, noticing the grenades on Donut’s armor. He aimed a pistol at Donut’s helmet. The officer froze as he heard a shotgun pump.

“Bad move,” Sarge snarled. The man kept his gun trained on Donut’s head.

“Step down now!” he yelled. He raised his other hand and pushed a button on his walkie talkie.

“I need backup! Lots! They’re hostile and have armor and weapons on them!” The officer froze as Church popped up in front of him.

“Hi!” Church greeted. “Remember that call you sent out? Well, everyone’s headed somewhere else now!” Donut slowly reached up and pulled off his helmet.

“I told Dad I want to be here,” Donut repeated. “He won’t listen to me. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we’re leaving!” He stormed back into the RV. Sarge jumped in after him. The officer stood stunned as the two RVs pulled away and drove off.

“What?” he finally managed to ask.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I... there was a plot but... I decided to delay advances so I could write in a friendly argument.
> 
> Okay, so Queenace116 came up with Sarge's wife's description, and Lhumyaki came up with her personality. Everyone who contributes will definitely be credited for their help with the story. Seriously, without all of you guys' help, this story would not be as long as it is, or as fun to write.

Sarge sat up not far from the border of Iowa.

“I recognize this land! Ya’ll want a home-cooked meal?” He asked cheerfully. Grif whooped. 

“Let’s do it!” He agreed. “Come on, Carolina, let’s go!” Carolina sighed. After the incident with the policeman, she had decided not to make them take their armor off, so they were still using the radios.

“Fine,” she finally relented. “Sarge, go tell Sheila and Lopez where to go.” The colonel jumped into the passenger seat, already instructing Sheila how to get to his house. Before too much longer, a small ranch was visible. The house was a dark grey with red trim. A small pack of dogs sat outside passively watching the RVs pull in. 

As soon as they were parked, Sarge jumped out. He was immediately confronted by a brown-haired woman holding a shotgun. She had it aimed at his head. Her green eyes were narrowed in distrust.

“Still got it!” Sarge cheered. “Darling, it’s me!” He pulled his helmet off, turning to show the woman his face.

“See, dear?” he asked. The woman glared for a moment longer before smiling and hugging Sarge. 

“I heard you were dead,” she told him. “Of course, I didn’t believe it because they called you Sarge. No way they didn’t know your real name!” Sarge suddenly paled. 

“Technically, I died twice?” he offered sheepishly. “I can explain!” He shrieked as the woman picked up the shotgun and aiming it again.

“It had better be good, or you’ll die three times!” she hissed.   
________  
The Reds and Blues all climbed out of the RV’s as Sarge started telling the woman about the past escapades. Of course, he left out the parts about actively attempting to murder Grif, but she did get to hear about the surgery, and see Lopez. 

After everyone was assembled, she took a look at them all and loudly declared, “Barbeque time!” Sarge whooped, running around the back of the house. 

“Well,” she grinned, “He still loves to cook.” Grif turned to stare at her.

“Wait, he can cook? He was always throwing us MREs, and he can actually make food?” he demanded. Simmons swatted the back of his head.

“If you wanted food, all you had to do was ask!” the cyborg retorted.

“When? After the poisoning, or when Tex was smashing us into the dirt? Oh, I know! Maybe when I got run over by a tank!” Grif yelled. Donut just smiled at the woman.

“This is normal, and I don’t know how to feel about that,” Church groaned. 

“Scared!” Caboose offered. “I do not like when they are fighting because the last time they fought, we learned that you were never coming back, but Temple is stupid, and he was wrong, because you are back and we can get you back again.” Church took a moment to process that statement before frowning.

“I am sorry,” Loco told Caboose. “I was not very nice, and I made you sad, and you do not deserve to be sad because you are nice.” Caboose hugged Loco.

“Come on, boys! I got a fire going and you need to come get however much meat you want!” Sarge yelled from the back. 

“Did you get the meat from the field or freezer?” the woman shouted back. 

“Freezer!” he replied.

“Good! We have too many calves this year for you to be hunting your meat down!” she told him, leading the soldiers to the backyard. 

“Caboose, Loco, come with me. We’ll go grab tables,” Wash offered. 

“You sure those two can carry out the old tables?” she asked skeptically. 

“Lucy, don’t worry about it. I’ve seen both of those boys lift tanks for fun!” Sarge laughed. 

“You must be going senile, old geezer,” Lucy giggled, but she stood back. 

“Wash is going to keep them on track. Otherwise, I hope you like the color blue,” Church snickered. Lucy turned to face him.

“Nah. I prefer red,” she retorted.

“Better Red than dead! I mean Blue!” Sarge added. Lucy walked over to see the meat. 

“Looking good there, honey,” she smiled. 

“Thanks,” Sarge replied.

“Not you, the meat,” Lucy snickered. Sarge grinned and wiggled his hips suggestively.

“This meat?” he smirked. Lucy cackled and fell on her back.

“Bow chicka bow wow!” Tucker shouted. Sarge ignored him, still grinning. 

Caboose, Loco, and Wash emerged from the house with the tables. Wash was carrying a stack of chairs for everyone to sit on. 

“Over here!” Carolina called. She was standing by a large cement patch on the ground. Caboose looked like he was going to throw the table until Tex appeared by his shoulder. He walked quietly over to the cement and set the table down gently. Loco copied him as Wash and Carolina set up the chairs. Church, Tucker, and Donut were sitting on the ground watching Grif and Simmons argue. 

“Anyone got any popcorn?” Church asked deliberately. 

“Popcorn!” Grif stopped to turn towards the AI. “Where?” Church pointed at Caboose.

“He keeps some in his helmet, in a pouch,” he lied. The Hawaiian moved threateningly towards Caboose, who just watched in confusion.

“Did we get the wrong Grif? Is this the evil Grif?” He gasped dramatically. “Has he been waiting in wait for the perfect moment to strike?!” Before he could continue his wild thought process, Grif tackled him. Loco jumped into the fray to help Caboose, causing Simmons to jump in as well. Wash ran in to try and pull Grif and Simmons out, prompting Donut to add himself to the mess. Finally, Carolina and Tucker jumped in, causing a huge fight to break out. Tex and Church were howling with laughter, and Sarge wasn’t doing much better. Lucy was mildly concerned, until Sarge finally handed her the spatula and charged into the fight, bellowing a warcry the whole way. The mess only got worse when Lucy’s dogs added themselves to the mix.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... Was argument an understatement? XD
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed. My family has a few plans for me now that I've moved closer, and most were made without my knowledge. In a couple days, everything will have settled back down, though, and I'll be able to go in and make everything look nice. 
> 
> If I messed something up, please tell me. I had no time for editing, and I'll probably forget to come back to this chapter to fix any mistakes, so let me know where I goofed. Hope you all are doing good! : D


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will go in and fix all the titles and mistakes after the holidays. For now, enjoy the chapter!

After a good five or ten minutes, Lucy was setting food on the table.

“Sarge, honey, Boomer should be getting home soon,” she shouted. The Reds and Blues were sprawled on the ground resting after that fight. The dogs were flopped over them. Sarge sat up from his seat.

“What about Alex?” he asked. 

“She’ll be by later. Apparently, she’s on her way to her new house.” Lucy set the last plate on the table. 

“Food?” Grif asked, jumping to his feet. “Can we eat now?” Lucy grinned.

“Armor off first. Then food,” she agreed. Grif almost teleported out of his armor, he moved so fast. Simmons was a bit slower, but managed to beat the others to the table.

“I love to strip and enjoy some good meat!” Donut cheered. Lucy almost dropped the spatula in shock. Simmons launched at Donut, ready for round two when Grif grabbed his foot and pulled him back. 

“Bow chicka bow wow!” Tucker snickered. 

“Hey chicka bump bump,” Caboose parroted. Church turned slowly to Tucker.

“When did he pick that up?” he asked. Tucker froze before dashing for the table. Sarge moved to get Caboose’s helmet pulled off from where it was backwards. Wash frowned, but went to help Loco. The whole group had just sat down when they heard a large explosion. Caboose fell backwards, teleporting just before he hit the ground. Tucker only had to look to see what was happening. 

“Can anyone tell me why someone’s set off a dozen sticks of dynamite? And why there’s a go-kart with another crate’s worth of dynamite on the back? And why there are two people in it, both whooping in excitement? And one’s waving a shotgun wildly? And DUCK!” Tucker shouted.

The whole group ducked as the dynamite on the back of the cart went off, sending the vehicle flying over their heads. Caboose appeared right where it should have landed, catching it in one hand.

“You were flying, and that is not fun in a go-kart. Trust me on this, it hurts,” Caboose smiled. He lowered the go-kart and walked over to sit back at the table, next to Wash. 

The driver of the cart stood up shakily.

“Dang, has Dad been feeding ya or what?” he asked. He had a red vest on over a white tank top. His hat was red and white, covering scruffy brown hair. He pulled a shotgun out of the cart, slinging it over his back.

“Nope, all we got was MRE’s,” Donut answered. Grif had frozen at the sound of the man’s voice.

“Not you again! Haven’t I suffered enough?” Grif wailed. 

“No,” Lopez answered. 

“Shut it, and let me be dramatic,” Grif retorted. 

“You’re dramatic enough already,” Tucker groaned. Church ignored then and moved over to the man.

“You’re Boomer, aren’t you?” he asked. Tex flickered into view next to him.

“I recognize him. He was the announcer for when you and Carolina attacked and killed Maine,” she answered. Church stared in confusion.

“No, because I was in the storage unit at the time,” he replied.

“Name’s Boomstick!” the man interrupted. “I came home because Ma asked me to.” The second man scampered over to his side.

“And I’m Wiz,” he greeted. “I came along with Boomstick for fun.” Simmons rose halfway out of his seat.

“You’re a cyborg,” he stated in a flat voice.

“You got a problem with that?” Wiz hissed, stepping forward.

“Nah, not with your sub-par abilities. Tell me, how high can you levitate, and how long are you able to go?” Simmons sneered. Grif stood as well. 

“Hey, Boombox,” he called. “What weapons did you bring today?” Boomstick bristled, stepping forward. Caboose jumped to his feet.

“You are the one who hurt Grif!” he bellowed, stalking over. Boomstick raised his shotgun and aimed at Caboose. Two blasts from shotguns sounded, one just a moment before the other. The group turned to see Sarge and Lucy scowling.

“Sit down, and stop arguing,” Sarge snorted. “We can fight after lunch!” 

“Pa! You’re home!” Boomstick grinned. “Want me to tell you bout this one Sargeant I met who sounded a lot like ya?” Sarge shifted slightly. 

“Go for it,” he finally agreed, looking a bit nervous. Boomstick immediately launched into his story, not noticing Sarge getting more and more nervous. Lucy passed out various cuts of meat to the group. They dug in with no hesitation. Wiz and Simmons were glaring at each other when a beat-up truck rumbled into the driveway. 

A young woman climbed out. She was wearing a red plaid shirt and blue jeans with brown boots. She had brunette hair pulled back into a ponytail. A shotgun rested on her back with something carved into the base. Her green eyes surveyed the motley crew, landing finally on Sarge.

“Hey, Dad,” she greeted. Sarge waved, shoveling more steak into his mouth.

“Alex!” Boomstick shot up and hugged her. “Good to see ya!” Alex swung her arm, connecting with Boomstick’s head. 

“Off,” she grumbled. “Back to the table, because Dad’s got some explaining to do.” Sarge gulped nervously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, it was short, but I'll have a longer one for you all in a couple of days. Sarge has got some explaining to do! : D


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's going to be a couple days before I can fix the titles and mistakes. I know I said that last chapter, but things keep happening.

“So, dad,” Alex began. “Where have you been lately?” Sarge grimaced slightly.

“With them,” he replied, gesturing to the Reds and Blues. 

“And where have they been?” she continued. 

“With me,” Sarge told her. 

“Oh for-” Carolina huffed. “We’ve been on Chorus fighting mercenaries and evil doubles. Happy?” Alex glared at her.

“And who are you?” she asked.

“Agent Carolina of Project Freelancer,” Carolina snapped.

“Perhaps proper introductions would be good?” Wash suggested.

“Make them snappy,” Alex agreed.

“Captains Grif, Simmons, Caboose, and Tucker,” Carolina pointed. Grif waved. Alex recoiled from his patch-work face, making him sneer at her. Simmons squeaked and turned back to his plate.

“Privates Donut and Loco,” Carolina continued. Donut waved and grinned at her along with Loco.

“And Agent Washington. I presume you already know Colonel Sarge?” Carolina sneered. 

“Better than you, I daresay!” Alex retorted. “Now, pa, start explaining.” Sarge froze from where he’d been trying to sneak away.

“Well, I joined the military, and umm, I became a colonel?” he tried. Alex glared at him as he sat back down.

“Well, it all began when this Butch Flowers came to check out my group in bootcamp,” he bean.  
___________  
Alex’s glare lessened as she listened. Boomstick finally snapped out of his shock.

“It was you! Back with Grif and Simon!” he bellowed.

“It’s Simmons, you brainless blaster!” Simmons snapped. 

“Captains Simmons and Grif!” Grif added in. Boomstick turned to face them along with Wiz.

“What would you idiots know about being Captains?” Wiz shot.

“More than you know about being a cyborg!” Simmons hissed. Tucker motioned to Caboose and Loco, who simply moved the tables away from the arguing soldiers. Granted, all four were out of their armor, but two were cyborgs and one was virtually indestructible.

Simmons moved to stand threateningly in front of Wiz.

“You’re so outdated, I was still better three years ago,” he sneered. Grif stood lazily in front of Boomstick.

“Can’t hurt me anymore, Cowpunk,” he taunted. Wiz and Boomstick struck at the same time. Grif just stood and took the hit to his ribcage. Simmons shot himself into the air.

“Try and keep up!” the cyborg leered.

“What was that, a poke?” Grif huffed as his ribs knit themselves back together. The growing bruise vanished. Boomstick recoiled, pulling his shotgun out. He and Wiz nodded and leapt into action. Boomstick started firing at Simmons, and Wiz charged Grif. His arm was emitting a strange whirring noise. Simmons yelped and moved higher, while Grif just raised his own arm. As Wiz hit him, the mechanical arm started spinning like a drill, carving a hole in Grif. Grif stared for a moment as the wound sealed itself.

“Look, you’re not going to win,” the Hawaiian snorted.

“And why not?” Boomstick and Wiz asked in unison.

“Because we’re the same guys who dismantled Project Freelancer, killed three of its members, stopped a planet-sized war, killed a mercenary, and, oh, I don’t know, SAVED THE EARTH?” Simmons screeched. He landed next to Grif.

“True,” the two announcers agreed.

“Get back here,” Alex yelled. “We’re having desert!” 

“CABOOSE!” Grif shouted. The Blue looked up at him. “TELEPORT ME!” he instructed. Caboose warped over to him.

“Where are we going, Grif?” he asked happily.

“To the table, duh,” Grif shot. Caboose teleported him back to the table with no issues. “Dessert!” he cheered. Lucy brought out a couple of pies, some ice cream, and a can of whipped cream.

“So, where are you boys, and girls, headed next?” she asked.

“Well, we were headed to Hawaii, then over to New York, then back to Chicago, spend some time in Texas, and enjoy California,” Sarge told her. “Finally, we hit the moon and go back to Chorus.” 

“So, how long are you staying on Chorus?” She sat down next to him.

“Just until they get their government up and working,” Wash assured her. “Then we’re all coming back to Earth.”

“We all should live here,” Grif mumbled around his pie. “Then we could get some good food!”

“We’ll see,” Lucy grinned.   
___________  
After everyone finished, they sadly packed back into the RVs. Lopez and Sheila had stored enough in the fridges and freezers that they wouldn’t need to eat anywhere until they hit Hawaii. As it was, the trip was uneventful. The airport was a different story.

So, it turns out that space-worthy armor didn’t pass through metal detectors. Or sentient weapons. Or, most importantly, the freelancers and Simmons. Carolina and Wash had the implants from getting their AI implanted, and Simmons was mostly metal.

“Well, I still don’t see the problem,” Sarge snorted. “We’ve proven he’s a cyborg, and those two just have AI implants.” The security guard looked irritated.

“That means nothing when he could be a bomb,” the man grumbled. Lopez and Sheila walked up.

“Andy is a bomb. I was a tank, and he was a robot,” Sheila smiled. “Now, Lopez and I are robots, and he is a cyborg.” The guard sighed.

“Look, we can’t let them through without a secure check,” he snapped. “Now, any of you with metal in you, get over there!” He gestured to a curtained area. Sheila, Lopez, Wash, Carolina, Grif, and Simmons all moved to the curtained area.

“Great, just what I always wanted,” Simmons sighed. “To get groped in a curtained room.

“I hear ya!” Donut cheered. Simmons screeched and leapt onto Carolina.

“See, my knee is metal. It had to be done after I spent too long-” Donut ducked as Simmons launched himself at him.

“Stop saying double entendres!” the cyborg howled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may not have a trick up my sleeve, but I've got two hyperactive hermit crabs in it. Does green bell pepper make them hyper? I need to know this.
> 
> On another note, I am on a potato internet. Because it's so slow, I can spend a literal hour waiting for a chapter to finish uploading. However! I am working on getting that fixed, so don't worry! : D


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, you know how peoples interest in certain fandoms shrinks a bit? Mine has. Now, I'll be back, but I have other fandoms I want to write for. Just so I don't make myself hate RvB. I'll be back when I can, and I'm sorry ;-;

The security checks were relatively simple, for Wash and Carolina. They just had the AI implants from Project Freelancer to deal with. Grif took a bit longer due to the scalpel Sarge had forgotten inside him, but he was let out fairly soon. Donut was out just after him. Apparently, security had been concerned about the scar on his face. Simmons, Lopez, and Sheila took considerably longer to get through. At one point, a whole bomb squad had been called in to ‘defuse’ a bomb inside Simmons. It turned out that the ‘bomb’ was just Simmons’ mechanical heart. After a lot of apologizing, he was sent out to wait with the others. After another hour, Lopez and Sheila finally emerged, looking irritated.

“Hey, Tucker, your dog is mad at me,” Sister called out, jogging over. Out of her armor, it was evident she was related to Grif. They had the same skin tone and eye color, with wavy, dark hair. Junior was walking silently behind her.

“Honk honk, blarg honk blargh. Blargh blarg, honk!” Junior told Tucker.

“Uhh, he’s mostly mad you only fed him dog food,” Tucker translated. Sister shrugged.

“He’s a dog! What else would I feed him?” she asked. 

“...” Tucker had no response. The shorter man just turned to the Sangheili Elite

“Honk blargh honk?” Junior asked. 

“Waiting on you guys,” he huffed. “Let’s go grab tickets.” The group maneuvered differently through the crowd to get to the desk. Tucker walked behind Junior as the crowd cleared around him. Wash and Carolina had similar situations as Junior. Caboose and Loco just walked ahead and ignored the crowd. Grif and Simmons hung near each other, Simmons trailing after Grif. Donut wove elegantly through all the people. Sister was almost like Donut’s mirror. Lopez and Sheila just walked behind everyone.

After a long walk, the group reached the front desk.They bought their tickets for the next available flight to Hawaii, which left in only a few minutes. Luckily, it was close enough for them to run for it. Everyone crammed into their seats. Within moments, Caboose, Sister, Loco, Grif, and Donut were asleep. Wash zoned out. Carolina seemed to be planning escape routes. Simmons was panicking. Lopez and Sheila powered down to conserve energy. Junior and Tucker were talking happily. Church and Tex were talking as well. 

All in all, the ride was peaceful. Their landing in Hawaii? Not so much.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter does have a verbally abusive parent, and hints towards physical abuse. If that triggers you, please don't read this chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After more than two months, I'm back and feeling refreshed! Who missed me, huh? 
> 
> Sorry about the wait. I would have had this out a few days ago, but I managed to catch a cold that's lasted almost a week. During February, I saw the Greatest Showman and I loved it! I can't quit listening to the songs from it! : D
> 
> Enough of my rambling here though, here's what you're actually here for! The next chapter! : D

Grif groaned and popped his back, shuffling off the plane. Sister was practically bouncing in place beside him.

"Hey Grif, it's the airport!" she squealed. "I can smell the ocean from here!" Grif grunted in agreement as his friends followed behind him. "Okay, I just remembered we have like, three rooms," he suddenly stated. "How is this going to work?"

"I have a plan!" Sarge volunteered. "Red team in one room, Blue in the other. And Wash and Carolina wherever they want to be." 

"A perfect plan, sir," Simmons agreed. Everyone nodded. 

"Sounds good." "I like it." "Whatever." "What about Lopez and Sheila?" "I am agreeing with everyone else!" "Me, too!" 

"Wait, what? Lopez and Sheila can go wherever they want, they're robots," Wash decided. 

"I am fine with that," Sheila confirmed.

"Yep," Lopez shrugged. Once again, the group moved onwards, heading off to get their bags. Once everyone had their stuff in their hands, they exited the airport. Grif and Sister paused to look up at the sky, stunned expressions on their faces. 

"Did you ever think we would be back here, Kai?" Grif asked quietly. She shook her head. 

"Not for a long time, and definitely not in one piece," she replied. Grif snorted at her in amusement. 

"Speak for yourself," he reminded her. She swatted at him.

"How about with two arms and legs?" she retorted. 

"I mean," Simmons piped up. Sister turned to him and grinned. 

"You don't count here," she snarked. Grif snickered at them.

"Come on, Mom should be home by now," he grunted, walking towards where he remembered their house to have been. He was right. It was a small house with a large space under it. 

"Honk?" Junior asked. Tucker blinked in surprise.

"Yeah, why is your house so high up?" he asked. Grif shrugged.

"You ever see a storm around here?" he replied, walking up a small flight of stairs. Sister ran and jumped up the stairs, landing firmly in front of her brother.

"MOM! I'M HOME!" she shouted, bouncing in. Grif shuffled after her before freezing. That was enough to prompt everyone to dash in and stand defensively around the man. Across the room, a taller, thinner man who looked similar to the Hawaiian siblings. Kai grinned widely and tackled him happily.

"Dad!" she shrieked happily. The man laughed and wrapped his arms around her.

"Kaikai!" he beamed. "It's been so long!" 

"I know, right? Let me put my stuff up!" She bounced off, leaving the man with Grif and the soldiers.

"Honey, how about you show these people to the spare room?" the man called. A woman who could only be Grif and Sister's mother walked out of the kitchen and smiled.

"It's lovely to have guests. Come, right this way," she waved, leading them farther into the house. The man grabbed Grif's shirt. 

"Boy, I told you never to show your worthless face around here," he hissed. Grif sneered up at him.

"Good thing it's not all my face anymore," he sneered. The man shoved Grif at the wall.

"I see you've gotten heavier," Grif's father continued as if he hadn't heard him. "Maybe you should actually get a job?"

"Aha, Nah. I like this group of idiots," Grif shrugged. "They've saved my life more than once. Definitely, more than you have." His father growled.

"I see you still have that tongue of yours," he growled. "I thought the army would take that off of you, in more than one way." 

"Actually, we all talk like that. That's all we did for years, is stand, talk, and get into the dumbest situations," the Hawaiian soldier smirked. "Now then, Sarge is waiting." His father let go of his shirt, glaring, before vanishing into the house. Grif glared back before following his friends. As he entered Red's room, Simmons pulled him aside.

"What was that?" he whispered. "And don't say nothing! I heard every word!" 

"Me, too!" Church agreed, popping into sight on Simmons' shoulder. "That was not a healthy family catching up." Grif scowled.

"Look, just leave it," he snapped. "He can't touch me, and he knows it." Simmons frowned, but backed off a bit. Grif sighed. "Look, my dad and I never have gotten along, and seeing me with a bunch of outsiders, and at least 80 percent replaced isn't a thing he can just gloss over. He'll settle back down in a while, and then it'll all be fine." Grif was lying through his teeth, and seriously hoped Simmons wouldn't press the issue. To his luck, the cyborg snorted and stalked off to organize all the clothes. Grif jumped as Lopez tapped on his shoulder.

"Look, just say the word and we'll make sure that thing can't hurt you again," the robot grunted. "That man is never going to be like what you're telling us, and we both know it." Church nodded.

"Dude, even the Church I was based off was a better dad, and he pitted his daughter against an AI version of her mother," he snorted. Tex appeared beside him.

"I heard that," she growled before vanishing, presumably returning to Carolina. Church shuddered.

"Anyways, I'm pretty sure Simmons called dibs on that dude, so, yeah. You just say the word, and you'll never have to worry again." Grif stared for a long moment.

"Touching as that is," he began, "I'm not sure we need to go that far. So look, I'll just stay out of his way, and it'll all be fine." Church and Lopez exchanged glances before frowning at each other. Church shrugged.

"Alright. Don't say we didn't try to help," the AI huffed before heading back to Blue's room. The Reds were put in Grif's old room, while the Blues were setting up in Sister's room. Grif flopped onto the mattress, determined to take a nap. As a result, he missed Sarge and Simmons leaving to go explore the house a bit more.   
_____________________  
"Ah, nothing like a cup of coffee after a long flight!" Sarge exclaimed, locating the coffee maker.

"Yes, sir!" Simmons agreed. 

"For a minute, I thought I was going to have to jump out of the plane while we were still up in the air. Good thing Grif wasn't flying, or I would have," Sarge joked. Both looked up as they heard footsteps. Grif's father walked over to them.

"Ah, hello, Mr. Grif sir," Simmons greeted. Grif's father looked over at him.

"Please, call me Haulani," he smiled. Looking at him, it was hard for Simmons to believe what he had heard. But he knew how this type of person was. They reminded him of snakes.

"If you insist, Haulani," Sarge beamed, thumping him on the back. Haulani briefly scowled. 

"I heard our family name, so I came to see if we were being called," he stated mildly. Sarge grinned.

"Sorry, that was me, talking about your son. It's a bit of a joke that he's the best driver, but worst at landing a bird," he explained. 

"We all go by our last names, sir," Simmons elaborated. "Like my name is Richard Simmons, but we all call me Simmons. We all grow used to it after a while. In fact, we call Kai Sister and Tucker's kid is Junior." Haulani nodded slowly. 

"When Kekela was a child," he murmured, "he was always obsessed with his toy cars and planes. He'd make them perform daring stunts. It was always so noisy, too, because he'd make the sound effects for every part." He shook his head, smiling. "So, are introductions to the lot of you in order?" he asked. Sarge grinned.

"Of course! I'm Colonel Sarge!" he greeted. Haulani blinked. 

"Colonel... Sarge?" he questioned. Sarge nodded vigourously. 

"Got promoted to be higher than the four Captains here," he explained. "Grif, Simmons, Caboose, and Tucker are all Captains." 

"It happened after a lot of shenanigans," Simmons groaned. "Not to mention what happened after it." 

"Come on, let's introduce you to everyone!" Sarge exclaimed, charging off towards the bedrooms. Simmons grumbled to himself and followed his leader, with Haulani trailing behind, scowling heavily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To summarize: 
> 
> We enter Hawaii at last! Sleeping arrangements are made, and we meet Grif's father, Haulani Grif. Haulani turns out to be verbally abusive, at the least. Simmons, Church, and Lopez all volunteer to help Grif, but he declines. And finally, Simmons and Sarge go to introduce Haulani to their little group.
> 
> So, next chapter, I'll try to have Haulani meeting everyone else. We'll also learn more of the Grif's family dynamic, and have some fun on the beach! 
> 
> My updating schedule will be more weekly than daily for a while, and I'm sorry about that. But hey, at least I'm back, right? : D
> 
> As always, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, short chapter again. And after I managed to get the last one so much longer than this, too. Oh well, I'll just do better next week. Either that or I'll just type these notes long enough to cover for the chapter.

“This is Donut,” Simmons motioned. “He’s kind of just the grenades guy.” Donut scoffed.

“I am not. I’m also the fashion expert,” he retorted. 

“And the guy who loves to say double entendres,” Sarge muttered. 

“What was that?” Donut asked, turning to face the older man.

“Nothing,” Sarge coughed. “Moving on.” Haulani stared for a second before following as they left the Red team’s room. “Over here, on Blue team,” Sarge continued. “You’ll see Wash, Carolina, Church, Tucker, Tex, Sheila, and Loco.” Wash was in a conversation with Carolina when they entered. 

“Wash is the blond,” Simmons added helpfully. “Carolina’s the red-haired one who looks like she could murder you.” Carolina shot him a glare, making him yelp and duck behind Sarge. 

“Nice to meet you,” Wash greeted. He rose and gave Haulani a handshake. 

“Where’s the other three idiots?” Sarge asked. 

“Outside, with Church. Tex is bothering Lopez and Sheila,” Carolina grunted. She stood up to greet Haulani.

“So how do you tell each other apart on the field?” Haulani asked. 

“Our armor,” Simmons replied. “I’m maroon, Sarge is red-”

“The proper color!” Sarge cheered.

“-Grif is orange, Kai is yellow, and Lopez is brown,” Simmons finished, sounding annoyed at the interruption.

“As for Blue team, I’m grey, Carolina’s teal, Tucker’s teal, Junior’s a Sangheili Elite, Church is light blue, Tex is black, and Caboose and Loco are blue. Caboose is the tallest and strongest, so he’s usually just given Freckles and allowed to go crazy. Uh, don’t tell him you’re on his team and then ask for help. He’s got so many kills that way,” Wash groaned. Church popped into view on his shoulder. 

“Yeah, and at least two of those are me!” the AI whined. Haulani jumped at the AI’s arrival.

“A spirit?” he asked, confused.

“No, Church is an AI,” Carolina answered. “Along with Tex.” 

“Nice ta meet ya,” Church snapped. “Wash, I’m going to KILL Caboose in a minute if he doesn’t stop pushing random items through me!” Wash groaned.

“Sarge, can you?” he asked, flopping back onto the bed. Sarge snickered.

“Can’t handle your own men?” he teased. “Red team is perfectly organized!” Wash grumbled at him.

“Come on, men,” Sarge announced. “We’re going to go find Caboose and Loco!”  
____  
Loco was the first one they found. He was sitting on the ground drawing with a stick. At first, Haulani thought he had been using a toothpick, but as they got closer, Loco’s size became apparent. It got worse when he stood up to bounce over to Sarge. 

“Sarge! I have been drawing and being good!” he chirped. Sarge patted his shoulder.

“Good man,” he praised. “Where’s Caboose?” Loco paused to think.

“He went looking for Church,” he replied. “He went that way!” The tall man pointed in a random direction. Sarge groaned.

“Wait here, Loco. Let’s go, men,” he huffed. They had only been walking a few seconds when loud footsteps sounded from behind them. 

“Sargeant! Hello! Oh, a new friend!” a voice boomed. Haulani tensed and turned around slowly, swallowing a scream of fear. This man was much taller than him. His head barely came up to the man’s chest. How had someone this big snuck up behind them? Not to mention he looked like he could easily throw all of them across the island without breaking a sweat. 

“Caboose, quit sticking things into Church to see if he breaks them again. I’m not going to help when he snaps,” Sarge told him. The giant man wilted.

“But Sargeant, it’s fun,” he whined. “You should try it some time.” Sarge snorted.

“And irritate the person that can control my armor and lock it down? No thanks,” he shot back. Caboose made a ‘hmph’ noise and turned to inspect Haulani. The Hawaiian took an involuntary step back.

“You look like Grif did before he got run over,” Caboose slowly stated. “That means you must be…” 

“Don’t break your brain over there,” Simmons snarked.

“His DOUBLE!” Caboose shrieked. “You’re not going to try to kill us all, are you?” Haulani shook his head.

“I- I’m his father,” he stammered. Caboose grinned. 

 

“That means you are a new friend!” he cheered. “We can be friends, but not best friends. Church is my best friend.” Haulani nodded slowly. This man was a giant, yes, and still very dangerous, but not an immediate hazard. 

“Lay off him,” Simmons piped up. “Come on, let’s get back to the house. It’s going to storm soon.” Haulani blinked in surprise. How did he know this?

 

“Okay,” Caboose griped. The little group marched back towards the house with Caboose trailing Sarge. Haulani let himself move to the back, staring up at the sky. Sure enough, dark clouds were starting to appear on the horizon. They were faint, though, and shouldn’t have been visible from where Simmons had been standing. So how did he know? Haulani needed to be careful a little longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Haulani is introduced to Red team and most of Blue team. Sadly, we don't meet Tucker, Tex, Lopez, or Sheila this chapter. Haulani gets scared by Loco and Caboose because of how big and strong they are, and Simmons seems to be a bit suspicious to Haulani. 
> 
> So, apologies for the late chapter. A friend hired me to do a very specific piece of art for him, and it took me a very long time to finish. He was happy with the end result, and I am now four bucks richer. : 3
> 
> I'm also making progress on my backlog of commissions for people, so I'm pretty happy with that. If I keep this up, I'll be done in no time! With luck, I'll be caught up soon and able to focus more on writing! So, I hope you have a good week, and if this applies, enjoy spring break! : D

**Author's Note:**

> Guess who showed up? He was there for two sentences, then gone. He'll be back. I want him to return. It will happen.
> 
> Question: Who wants Loco to basically be adopted into the Caboose family? Or, do you want the family to hate him for his former roll in almost blowing up the Earth? Or, should they hate him, then warm up to him?
> 
> And: If you have any ideas for the Reds and Blues families, go ahead and submit them. I'll try to use them, but I can't make any promises. On that note, I'll update this in a week. Finals are coming up, but they shouldn't be too bad, so I don't think I'll have to delay any updates. Bye! : D


End file.
